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Found: French class index card

17 Sep

I have longs brune, ovale visage. I am mince et courts, malin, drole, franc.

I love the things I find from previous classes. One of college teaching’s great perks for a pack rat.

Another Treasure From My Grandmother

13 Jul


My grandmother must be cleaning out the “party supply” area of her house, because she has now bestowed upon me this pack of pink elephant swizzle sticks.

20130713-220342.jpgI’m not entirely clear what a swizzle stick is for, but I suppose that they will be a nice accessory to any of the fine cocktails I choose to make at my luau.

Awesome crap from my grandmother. Vintage cocktails and entertaining ideas “For all the parties you have!”*

14 May

Make any eat-out a luau with Hawaiian Punch

My grandmother, (bless her crazy 87 year old heart), visits and leaves bags of stuff she wants us to have, but doesn’t want to see us go through and reject, as we have been known to do all of our lives. More often than not, these bags contain crap like expired coupons for Red Lobster, recipes for grilled vegetables (people need a recipe for that?), sponges and pens endorsing her local politicians, and tips for controlling ants that she clipped from a 1997 newspaper, then circled and double underlined the nuts and bolts of the article. But sometimes, sometimes, there are treasures like this.


I’d like to take a moment to zoom in on the lady in the middle, proudly holding what seems to be two giant prime rib and pineapple skewers. Love your shirt, sister!


Luau Picnic! make picnics Luau-festive with a special treat for every member of the family.


Oh, jeez. And I quote: Pour Hawaiian Punch for baby into his bottle and pack with his baby food – ready to bring him island refreshment. (and cavities and ADD and diabetes and cancer from the Red Dye #5) WTF? Did people really do this? Well, this right here should put an end to any breastfeeding vs. formula feeding war, if you believe the media hype. People used to put Hawaiian Fucking Punch in baby bottles. Mommas feed your babies the best way you can – breast, bottle – and say no fucking way to Hawaiian Punch. Okay.


This dude’s had too much punch.

It’s gone to his cheeks! Love the illustration in all it’s late 60’s glory! That Hawaiian Punch is probably dosed.

Peace, Love and Hawaiian Punch!

Just some carefree and groovy teens having a beach-luau.

*It should be noted that I do not have very many parties. Certainly not in the way my grandmother must think I do. And that, I suppose, makes me wish I did.

Pink Foil lipstick. This reminds me of:

5 Jan

1. 1992. High school drama club cast party for Damn Yankees at SeƱor Rattlers where we, of course, danced to Rock Lobster and Paradise by the Dashboard Light. Then, we stood in a big circle, swaying and singing That’s What Friends Are For (lame, right?) and drank virgin margaritas. I have videotaped proof of this.

2. Also,same year, working at the Old Salt on the boardwalk in Ocean City and cleaning the scrimshaw pieces and cranberry glass and hosing down the hermit crabs.

3. Also, F.M.’s 17th(?) birthday party, probably ’93. He wore an Emerson, Lake, and Palmer shirt and had a cake and, like, half the party was stoned. There were Doritos and Pepsi.

4. A.E.L., 1992, A.E.L. kept her lipstick in her pocket and applied it often. I kept mine in a bag or a pocket and rarely used it. I have never been one to freshen up my make-up.


Pink Foil Lipstick.